Another Weekend Behind Me

Its been another weekend, this one a bit more eventful than others. Found out that my 6 year old had stole a very nice watch from her babysitter so she was grounded for most of the weekend but I think we got it through to her that this isn't something that she can do. I also made her apologize to her babysitter and hand the watch back. *crossing fingers* Hope that got through. So I'm currently back at work( I know shame on me)and I'm really starting to hate my job. I work for my dad and it's starting to ware on me. I really want to be back in NC again and make it on my own. I'm actually hoping by next August before my daughter goes to 2nd grade we will have moved again. Here's to hoping. Me and My daughter have also put up our family alter in our kitchen up on a wooden food tray. It works wonderfully, although my cat/familiar Luna keeps drinking the moon water, so I had to put a cap in it. I'll be posting pictures soon. :)

Samhain, is quickly approaching us and thanks to PaganDad's blog about skull garland, I think I have a new craft for me and my daughter. :) I'm finally really starting to do pagan things with my daughter. Last night, she holds up one of her two dream catchers and tells me "If I have this then why do I keep having bad dreams?" I told her to give it to me and that I would charge it and clear it and it should be fine. So before her bedtime I took it outside(it was freaking warm last night) and grounded myself, sprinkled sea salt, and moon water over them all the while chanting Bad Dreams in Good dreams out. Then for added measure(my daughter really hates nightmares) I traced a pentacle onto each dream catcher and imagined a white pentacle on them. So needless to say no more bad dreams last night. I told her anytime she wants me to I will charge the dream catchers for her.

And We're back

Wow been a minute since I've been on here. Like most of my projects I get started only to get distracted by everyday life. But lately I've added a ton of blogs that I liked and wanted to keep up with and had to logon to here again in order to save said blogs. So currently here I am blogging when I should be doing something more productive but hey it is what is it.

Alot has happened since march. I currently started the process for my divorce. My daughter who is six is refusing to see my ex and my ex has only seen his son once since moving back here to Indiana over 3 weeks ago. Also said ex isn't paying any kind of child support either because and I quote " I can't get a job". Trust me tons of excuses end up following that statement out of his lips but mainly those excuses are " My truck isn't working right" "no one wants to hire me" "I can't sit down for too long because of my back and I can't stand up for the entire day because of my back". So.....i'm not holding my breath when it comes to him getting a job. He once told me his truck wasn't working so I told him get the buss and he then said he didn't have a bus schedule and I informed him to look it up. His response no internet. *sigh* It's a lame excuse but there you go. Meanwhile I'm working my booty off trying to pay my medical bills(with out going for bankruptcy) and pay for childcare. Thankfully my parents are letting me stay here for free and free food. But other than that everything else falls on my head.

On a brighter note, Currently Reading Charline Harris's Undead and Unemployed. I've began to reread all of the Sookie Stackhouse books and Once I got though book 7 maybe it was 8, it was the one about the vamp summit. And that is all the Stackhouse books I have in ereader format and I'm not willing to buy more right now. So I'm rereading Queen Besty Series and Let me tell you I forgot how much fun these books are. And they are a bit more detailed when it comes to the love scenes than the stackhouse series(woot!) And just overall laughable. I really enjoyed reading these back about 5 years ago and now its even better. :) I'm a total book fiend if you couldn't tell.

Well I think that is all for now.

Therapy?

Here lately my stress level has been above normal. Not without reason of course. But then there are times when i can't destress even when i have nothing to stress about. I don't enjoy my children like I should. I'm having problems getting excited over seeing people. I want to avoid people whenever I can......but then i remember what my friend Pat was like when he went to therapy. The people he saw just gave him heavy duty drugs and sent him on his way. In which he went home to abuse those drugs in order to try and cope with his stress. So it's not something that I take lightly. The parents are supportive of it though. I'm big on the legalization of cannibis. Alot of my friends are like, " just smoke more and you'll be fine". But one, I can't, 2 it's expensive, and 3 I'm very unmovitated when I smoke. I believe that cannibis is good and that helps but I think at this point I need more.
Last night putting my baby down for bed, it takes about 20 minutes to get him to fall asleep. Then he woke me up at 2am. And I didn't get back to sleep until about 3:15 am. And i over slept because for whatever reason my alarm didn't wake me up. So I wake up to my mom saying, " It's 6:30, time to get up". I'm suppose to get up at 6am at the lastest. I'm glad that I did all my morning prep was done last night. So all the baby's bottles were made and my 6 year olds lunch was done. But I'm stressed out beyond belief and this is just normal stuff. I don't think I should have as much stress as I do right now in my life. I just don't want to be put on something heavy to where I can't breastfeed or take care of my kids.
Work isn't too bad, right now I'm doing tons of ebay stuff for dad. He wants to sell alot of old machines and contents that the homeowners don't want. It's Time consuming and alot of work but other than that it's not hard.
I often wonder why I feel like I'm 18 again. Prolly because I'm back living with my parents and working for them again. It's funny because I always used to say that I would never work for Dad again and yet here I am. But i don't feel like i could pass up the opportunity this time around. Plus with all my medical bills and brett not even calling me after I sent him money......well what can you do? But push forward and get his ass in court in 5 more months. :)Well back to work.

Working and Motherhood

So just a few short 9 weeks after my son was born, I am back and working for the parents. It's not to bad, I get a company vehicle that i can't drive anywhere else but to and from work ( i shouldn't have sold my old van), get paid a decent amount of money. Although will over 6000 dollars of medical bills to worry about and a credit card debit of 5200 dollars, it's prolly not going to be enough. But I'm trying to stay postive and not stress out. Which being a Pisces isn't all that easy to do. Oh woo to me and my money troubles.

I'm done having kids though. This is the second time that I have dumped the man that I had the kid with. And the second time that the father doesn't want a whole lot to do with the kids. I mean he says that he wants to but then after I gave him his half of our joint refund, I haven't seen any support or anything. All of my refund has gone to my medical and credit card bills and cell phone bills, auto insurance and etc. Since I gave him his money I haven't heard from him. Which has been about a week. So I'm giving it more time before I get pissed off. But come on. He expects me to give him a call??? When he has nothing I want except money but he's not going to give me any so why bother? He just keeps saying that he has to support himself first or he'll never get on his feet and there fore never send me support. Well I'm not seeing it now so whatever. Seems just to be excuses.

So I'm thinking about taking over the care of my friends sugar glider. She is really cute and her name is Honey. My friend can't take care of her any more since he has 3 cats and 2 small dogs. But i'm going to do more research first. :) Updates later.